I sit outside, breathing in the Akasha yoga, focusing on my relationship with the deva in effort to change my vibrational state. Inside the house, a generous donation from an ally met whilst in the Land of Enchantment takes the form of a bucket filled with food. Though Yeshua and I have given our Word that we would leave by the 1st of the month, we have been waiting on donations to power our movement forward, intent on sharing the Gift and presentation of the Mythica in the node of Light that is Sedona, Arizona.
As I sit and breathe, I reflect on how much MORE I could be doing the practices, working the inner alchemies to transform my circumstance. Contemplating this brings us deep inner bile towards God, which I consciously work with in attempt to maintain an alkaline relationship with What Is.
Every day, it seems that Yeshua and I remind each other to do the practices, reinforcing our fellowship and brotherhood in effort to stay in Gratitude for the unfoldment. It is not easy for me, requiring the Forgiving and Acceptance of so much, wheedling away at the patterns of confusion that still linger despite the enlightenment I have achieved in the nature of form itself.
There is simultaneously a frustration and a sense of the perfection of the unfoldment, in which the Mythica and her maintenance costs have been paid (barely) yet again. And while we are ashamed at having no money to pay for rent, we have been diligent in building the Mythica in effort to bring this Gift to the People … a prayer of appreciation to God deeply in contest with the ongoing rancor towards God and the frustrations of feeling denied in the form of the Love that I have always desired.
So I sit. And breathe. And go deeper into the Akasha yoga, as I feel I MUST. I work towards more sovereignty in my vibration, dissolving the deep-rooted hatred towards the mortal condition and my general distaste for the circumstances we have endured in the journey to Heaven on Earth.
It is not lost on me that we have made HUGE strides, yet neither is it lost on me that we have been demanded to do *constant* process to negotiate the shifting and flickering states of consciousness that define the human condition. There is, to me, a lifelong witnessing of the shift between realms, at last coalescing into the Akasha yoga and a method of delivery for the Commonwealth.
Honestly said, I would much rather be loving human existence. Feeling the “flow”, the nurturing and the sweet deliciousness of Shakti. So many years of frustration in bringing this seed to blossom, the sheer magnitude of tolerance and forgiveness that I have had to cultivate for the vibration of this Age and what we must do is heart-wrenching. And yet, I see no other option but to continue doing the inner practices in effort to change the vibration such that *hopefully*, the easement and connection with the Commonwealth may at last come to bear.
I do feel an authentic, unconjured sense of Gratitude for the Magician’s Oasis and the fellowship with Yeshua that has enabled us both to ground out the techniques of the Akasha and deva yoga, that has shown us repeatedly that despite what we must endure in this Age, God has provided. I recognize that such is a HUGE movement forward for me, as this year of the Journey Home is very much about having Love for ‘What Is’, in effort to shift realms and at last be in the resonant connecting that is our birthright.
As I breathe into a forcibly rekindled sense of inspiration, a wave of tiredness comes over me. I feel old. Exhausted from the endless effort to breach the clouds and bask in the Sunlight of Abundance. I long for an *environment* of Shakti, of nurturing, that soothes and softens me, where I am not demanded to conjure such things out of the nothingness of errant thoughts and may drink in the sweet nectar of the physical plane, rejuvenating my Self and resting at last.
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