A different shade of Self

An excerpt from ‘Origins’, coming soon

I’ve always felt like a stranger in a strange land.  Like a visitor, in a continuum that was not my own.  Where the very foundations of the way I experienced reality seemed out-of-sync with the ways things seemed to be in the World around me.  For many years, the most basic qualities of mortal Life were consistently incomprehensible, as if the Ideas that made up mainstream reality were like sand slipping through my fingers.  There were things I simply could not grasp, as if they existed in another frequency, one to which I was not familiar.

Such were basic things.  Human things.  The very firmaments of what it meant to be mortal, to be human.  Things like cooking, cleaning, time and space.  Like the memes and norms of relationships, the pacing, the questions and answers.  I have often told people, it was thirty-five years before I could consistently understand the nature of what was called ‘cooking’.  Now to be clear, it wasn’t as if I simply could not understand them,  There were times I could grasp the ideal of cooking, the mundane repetition of cleaning, and other human chores (as I saw them), but that understanding would fade, lost in the abyss of a liquid consciousness.  There were days that I understood the concept, could even perform the action, and others where I would, quite literally, stand in front of a stove for 20 minutes trying to fathom how things became other things.  It was a very savant state of being.

Likewise, human institutions like ‘jobs’, ‘culture’, ‘social dynamics’ were somewhat lost on me.  My consciousness had little grip on them.  Like the ideal of cooking, my understanding would wax and wane like a fickle Moon.  Luckily, or more accurately, dharmically (aligned with the Purpose that God set for me) I was raised in a wealthy household that had a beautiful soul who cooked meals for me as a childe, and then, as I fumbled my way through my early twenties, was afforded a stipend to survive which I mosty spenet on food.

There were things I did understand though.  What I would later realize were quite esoteric or ephermal for many others were simple, solid things to me, the recognition of which would continue to cement my feeling that I was simply ‘not of this World’.  These were what many beings called the ‘subtleties’ of the World, the mechanics of what was called ‘vibrations’, or ‘manifestation’, or ‘magick’.  Unlike what I would later come to call the Surface plane of perception, these were VERY solid to me.  In fact, to me, they were the REAL World, defining the firmamenet of what was, in which the other World, that which most of humanity seemed to wade through, seemed like a shadow.  An echo.

Over time, such would become the foundation of the Mythica, my mapping out of the World as I saw it.  Such was more than an act of charity.  It was an act of survival, in which I recognized that I simply could not navigate through the World as it was perceived on the surface, and had to build myself some sort of compass, to move me across the various planes of vibration that I would later come to call ‘realms’.


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